Skip to content

Be the star of your own life

Every one of us has the potential to become the star of their own lives. This helps us feel like the main character in our lives, someone who has influence over it. Life seems to hold more possibilities and the future looks bright.

When you look after yourself, you are also telling yourself that you are important and worth the effort. You can learn to be more lenient and kinder to yourself. You will notice your successes and positive changes. You will accept that you are not perfect and sometimes make mistakes but are valuable regardless.

Try to approach things through your strengths and by encouraging yourself. When you encounter setbacks, focus more on the solutions than the problems themselves. And dare to dream – dreams give you strength for your everyday life.

Try to approach things through your strengths and by encouraging yourself.

Resources give you energy for everyday life

When you recognise your strengths and resources, it is easier for you to use them in your life. Resources could include your own attributes or anything related to your environment that gives you energy and takes things in a good direction.

The following are examples of resources:

  • good relationships
  • organised nature
  • ability to plan for the future
  • familiar local shopkeeper who sells bread approaching its best before date on a discount

You can surely find things from yourself and your environment that give you energy. Locate your resources and try to utilise them as diversely as possible in different situations. This allows you to maximise their ability to do good.

Find your own slogan

A  slogan can help you see things the way you want to see them – by consciously using the power of thoughts to cope and feel better. You can use your slogan as a general life motto or as a thought that gets you into a good mood even when faced with challenges. Using a slogan helps you to continually reinforce your belief that you are good enough and will manage just fine.

A slogan can help you see things the way you want to see them.

A good slogan encourages you and spurs you on. For instance:

  • If life gives you lemons, keep them. Because hey, free lemons!
  • Be awesome.
  • Ships are safe in the harbor but that’s not the reason they were built for.
  • Life is too important to be taken seriously, and too short to be enjoyed later.

Nyyti ry/ Motto campaign 2015

Focus on solutions when faced with setbacks

Difficulties and failures are a part of life – no one can avoid them. What matters is how you act when faced with setbacks. By focusing on solutions instead of problems, it will be easier to move forward and avoid unnecessary feelings of guilt.

What matters is how you act when faced with setbacks.

Remember the three principles of solution orientation:

  1. Only fix what is broken.
  2. Do more of what works.
  3. Do less of what does not work.

Even small choices we make when faced with setbacks can often affect the outcome. When you utilise solution orientation in troubling life situations and harness your resources to help you, the outcome is likelier to be good than if you only wallow in the problems.

Tips for solution-orientation:

  • Pay attention to what works – your attention makes it stronger.
  • You have all the resources you need to make a change or solve a problem. Just do your best – whatever is possible right now.
  • You are the foremost expert on yourself, your work and your relationships. You know what is good for you.
  • Set your goals yourself according to your own will and wishes.
  • Problems have multiple solutions. Search for the solutions that differ from usual methods of action.
  • Playfulness, humour, creativity and positivity are all important when searching for new potential solutions.
  • Even larger problems could be solved with small changes.
  • It is more useful to create mental images of what the solutions look like than to focus on dwelling on the past.
  • Utilise your own and others’ experiences when solving problems.
  • Solve problems together with other people.
  • Remember to give feedback to everyone involved in the solving process.
  • Thank yourself and others involved.

Dreams provide energy for your everyday life

Do not forget about dreams as one way to influence your wellbeing. Dreams both encourage us to create something new and develop us as human beings. If we deny ourselves dreams, we are living in an energy-saving mode.

The journey towards the dream can often be wonderful in itself even if the dream does not ever come true. Dreaming in itself helps you cope better in your everyday life. Dreaming brings meaning to life as you have goals to aim for. Dreaming is also an excellent way to relax.

The journey towards the dream can often be wonderful in itself even if the dream does not ever come true.

Practice dreaming

An example of how to practice dreaming is writing down your dreams, big and small. You can draw a treasure map or write down the path of your dreams.

If dreaming feels difficult, approach it through your goals. Where would you like to be in life in 10 years? On the other hand, your needs and values can help you in dreaming, too. What would your life look like if all of your most important needs were satisfied and you were leading your life to the full according to your own values?

Start with the things you consider important and worth pursuing. No matter what your dreams are like, they are yours and just right the way they are. Do not forget that even if your dreams never come true, you are good enough the way you are. You have the right to be seen and heard exactly as you are.

Be the star of your own life!

Food for thought:

  • Can you name your strengths and things that give you energy (=resources)?
  • How do you act when faced with setbacks?
  • What kinds of things do you dream about?